Monday, August 31, 2009

Great weekend...starts a shitty week?

We totally had a great weekend this past weekend. I arrived home Thursday night to see the house spotless. Amazed I know. I would have paid to see the pic of totally shock on my face as I surveyed my clean house that wasn't cleaned by me. Rich claims that he did it, but I am feverishly looking over our bank account for any cleaning services that may have been performed.

So clean house left us to more time to get out and do things. We ran a few errands Saturday morning, nothing special by any means. But a weight was off our shoulders with no time restraints holding us down. My mom came over and it was like old times with her. We joked around like we haven't done in a while. It was really nice to see her is such a good mood.

Saturday night Rich and I went to a comedy club. It was such a blast. I love to laugh so it was good times. The drinks were quite yummy too.

Sunday we met my dad at the Air Force Museum were we had our own personal tour guide, my dad, showing us around. The boys had a BLAST. They both love airplanes so it was fun for them.

But coming back, my ears were hurting and I had been having this rumbling in my lungs all day. Felt like there was fluid in my lungs that would bubble up every time I breathed in. I was getting really dizzy and I just didn't feel good. I feel better today, I just hope I am not getting sick yet again. I am generally a healthy person, I have never been sick so many times in a row in my life. I think I am just super run down with school and all, but I will make it through.

Friday, August 21, 2009

I miss it

I remember his squishy little face. His little cry. The little grunts he made when he was nursing. The little preemie onsies we had to get because he was SO tiny it was all that would fit him for the first few weeks.

Our neighbor down the street just had her baby boy. Her first. I can't wait to get a glimpse of the new little guy. So it just has me thinking of when we had Eddie.

Everything little thing was so new and exciting. I loved waking up several times in the middle of the night to nurse him. It was so easy to just strap him up in his car seat and go. I remember so clearly my first trip out with him alone. We went to the mall and I was SO nervous about nursing him in public. I would get knots in my stomach before every check up he had. I couldn't stay in the room for his shots, so I always made Rich go with me. For a while, it was just Eddie and Me. I miss those days.

I think I have clung onto Luke's babyhood for so long because I don't feel like I have had that much time with him. Trying to keep up with two boys, time goes by so quickly. Luke and I have only had a handful of adventures alone together. Its hard to try and divide up the time.

So all this thinking of newborn babies is putting the fever back in me. Here's hoping that this is just a 24 hour bug.

Friday, August 14, 2009


So yeah nothing to really report of here lately. I started a new class this past week and I love it. We are finally getting hands on and learning how to apply what we already have learned. I can't believe that I am almost done! Its kinda scary, I am starting to get freaked out by getting back into the work world. How are my babies going to react when they are in daycare all day now? Oh good grief. The funny thing is, one of my ex boyfriends from a LONG time ago, his mother teaches the class. She is the sweetest thing, and I remember when I was breaking up with her son I was more heartbroken that I wouldn't see her anymore! Good times.

The boys are as rambunctious as ever. Lucas wants so bad to be just like his big brother, and sometimes he just can't hang. Poor little guy. He gets so frusterated that he can't do the things brother does. I feel his pain. I was the baby and my sister is 3 years older than I. I was always wanting to do the things she got to do.

Rich was in a little fender bender Monday. Some lady hit him at a stop light cause she was trying to reach for a tissue and took her foot of the brake and hit the gas for some reason. The car is okay, just a little damage and Rich is hurting in his shoulders and neck. So now all the fun begins of the phone tag with her insurance company and trying to get the repairs and medical stuff covered. It sucks but at least it was a minor accident.

So see, told you it was borning around here.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Happy Birthday to me

o 27. Here I am. Yay.

I have had several conflicting emotions through out the day. For some reason this birthday seems different than all the others.

At one moment I think Gosh, I finally feel my age. I sorta have an old soul I guess so I have always felt older, not more mature, but older.

Then I think, Gosh I am only 3 years away from 30. FUCK where did that come from? Not that I think 30 is old, but looking back at the past few years it just doesn't seem like being 23 was that long ago.

But I am okay. I've got my cheesecake and some beautiful flowers. And my boys have been fairly good today. Life is good.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Twilight dreams

I can feel it. I am lying there, candles burning all around me. The only light in the room is coming from their glow. The room has a slight chill to it, a soft cold breeze flowing through. I can't tell if I am on a bed or a couch. All I know is that it feels like a cloud, at least what I imagine laying on a cloud would feel like.

I am dressed in a long black gown. Satin tickling my skin. My hair is down, scattered like the fall leaves all around my head. I feel dazed, seem to be drifting in and out of conciseness.

I smell the sweetest smell in the air. I can't quite place the scents. Flowers? Chocolate? Its a scent that I have never smelled, yet I don't think I can ever do without. And then HE is there. I didn't notice him come into the room, I didn't even hear a door open or close. Like he appeared out of nowhere.

He is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Tall and muscular. And with his pail white skin, its as if he was chiseled out of the finest white marble. His eyes are a golden hue, almost gold like. As he steps closer to me, the color starts to turn into the deepest of red. Now that he is next to me, they are almost pitch black.

He speaks to me, although I can not understand what he is saying. I am too focused on the sound of his voice. It doesn't quite sound like music but it doesn't seem as though he is speaking to me in English.

He reaches behind my neck and grabs a patch of hair. Through his force, I don't seem to feel any pain. He tilts my head to the right. As he leans down, he kisses my neck. His lips feel like cold stone, yet it sends the warmest sensation through my body. He sits up and looks me in the eye and he speaks, this time I can understand him. "Are you ready to join me for eternity?" I can't seem to even squeak a sound out so I shake my head yes.

He leans down to bite my neck and then...I hear Luke talking to Moo Cow through the monitor. Time to wake up and get back to reality.

Damn those Twilight books. Great dream. A little weird that I am dreaming of vampires, but nontheless.