Monday, October 4, 2010

Random thoughts

Welcome folks to another edition of Random Thoughts by Courtney. So since the work week is BUSY and I have to move in a few weeks, my thoughts are kinda scattered and random lately. Buckle your seatbelts and hold on tight, we have some really random ones today.

~So I passed a house on my way to work this morning where the people who lived there must have raked leaves over the weekend because there was a huge pile of leaves in the front yard. I have to say that a REALLY huge part of me wanted to pull my car over and jump into the pile. So what if I am 28 years old? And it was dark out? And I didn't know the people who lived there?

~Really what do people think when they see me jamming out to music at 5:30 in the morning in my car? Do they think "Wow I wish I could be that happy of a person and find joy at being up so freaking early in the morning"? Or do they think "Listen crazy, its 5:30 in the morning, chillax!"? I'm pretty sure its the later.

~Is Lady Ga Ga really so weird like 100 percent of the time? Do you really think she walks around draped in meat while she's grocery shopping or picking out underwear?

~You know I usually don't mind being lost in a crowd. Even though I am a lovely Leo and I like the spotlight on me, I don't mind being a small fish in a big pond. But lately it feels like instead of being lost in the crowd, the crowd has almost swallowed me whole and I have become the ground that they trample on. Its an odd feeling and I don't know any other way to describe it.

~I've gone a little boy crazy lately. Blame it on my raging hormones. Blame it on me being single. Blame it on the But I can't help myself with all these cute boys I keep running into lately. Unfortunately most of them are married. Or taken. Or don't notice me. Go figure. Such is my luck.

~OH-I thought I was having a heart attack Saturday. I was scared out of my mind. I didn't want to go to the ER outta fear that they would tell me that I am not so intelligent and it was just gas or a pulled muscle. But the pains in my chest where just WAY too much so my ex-husband took me in. Turns out I had pleurisy which is basically an infection between your heart and lungs. So I am not dying, nor did I have a heart attack. But I am better now, and I can officially say I have never been more freaked in my life.

~BTW-I have never felt more alone in my whole entire life than I did with my little ER episode Saturday. Yes my ex and I are still on good grounds and no I am not trying to play pity party on Courtney. But since my mom and dad live like an hour away, I had no one else to call on in my hour of need. I felt really alone and it probably made me freak even more than what I needed to.

 ~With all the sad sack thoughts I have been having, it humors me that my eternal "half glass full" spirit in me immediately follows a sad dark thought with "but hey it could always be worse and you can only make it better.". I guess its kinda comforting to know that sad thoughts I have sometimes are just fleeting and that I will always find the brighter side of things.

~On the plus side, I finally tried Nutella and I am in LOVE!! The good thing, I get the taste and joy of chocolate and its semi ok for me to eat. At least its not loaded with like high fructose corn syrup and all.

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