Back to contributing to society

I GOT A JOB!!!!!!!

No freakin joke. I got the call today. The doctor himself called. YAY!

I wasn't feeling good about this interview. It lasted a whole 5 minutes. He told me what my responsibilities would be, asked if I could handle it, and then told me he had more interviews.

I left feeling baffled. I didn't ask about benefits, he didn't want to know my strengths and weaknesses. I didn't get to talk myself up. Maybe that's what saved me. Haha.

So anyways, he called me today and offered me the job. YAY! I can't stop saying YAY! I start Monday. I am so excited. I feel guilty already about having to leave my babies, but I also feel good in knowing that I am starting back to work and it will only get better from here.

So no longer am I a slacking, unemployed, over user of Facebook. I will be back to contributing to society and having money. YAY!

Love my booty!

Yeah, that's totally a pic of my booty. Not really. Remember I lie.

So I was reading articles like I usually do out of boredom and I came across this article, 4 Body Part That Make Us Self Conscious and it got me thinking.

There are parts on my body that I love, and there are parts that I hate. Its true, its true. I love my booty. I was blessed with a nice budunkadunk. Granted now in my later 20's I now have to do actual exercises to keep it looking good. I have great upper arms. I have always have defined arms but now thanks to weights and lifting my children they are even more defined. Overall my body is OK.

So why can't we be happy with what we have? We all know we can't have it all (except for those freak Victoria Secret models, I happen to believe that aren't really human), but in our endless need for perfection we still try. Diets, endless hours at the gym, even clothes that promise to flatten tummy's and lift butts. Its crazy what lengths we go to.

So I am stepping up on my soap box today to highlight the nice things. Yeah my legs may not be 5 feet long, my stomach may be lacking an entire 6 pack, and my breast are no longer as perky as they were in my high school days. But I have more to offer than my body, like a sense of humor and a kind heart. And that, to me at least, is pretty freakin awesome.

Screwed perception

Get mad. Get glad. Get even?

I'm sure we've all heard this saying before. But just how well does it apply?

Ok. I'm not a fighter. I hate confrontation. I avoid it at all costs. But sometimes its inevitable. You can't avoid it and for your own sanity's sake words need to be said. But is there a right way to fight? You know, doing the "adult" thing and talking it out?

I don't fight dirty. Yes granted I may lose my temper from time to time and a door may get slammed or a small item like a child's toy may be tossed. But I always try to keep my emotions in check, and watch my mouth, because words hurt. You can never unhear something that's been said. Yes you can always apologize until your blue in the face, until the cows come home, or until pigs are flying out of your butt (and really I would like to see that happen, it may make me forget what got me mad in the first place!). But, at least for a girl, you will never be able to forget what was said.

What happened to us being adults? Whats with the name calling and ridiculous accusations being made? Do we now live in a world where being angry with each other and never reaching an actual solution is whats considered the norm? Is it really now ok to call each other names and say things just to hurt each other?

Call me silly, but I was under the impression that you had confrontations to find an actual solution. You know we don't see eye to eye so lets see what we need to change to solve that.

So its time to take off the gloves. And lets make love not war. Yes, I am that cheesy.

Liar

Did you know that I am actually from Texas. Yeah, I also graduated for the University of Texas (hook 'em horns), and while attending school there, I was a cheerleader.

Okay non of that is true. I lived in Texas for 6 years and am an avid fan of UT.

See this all started when I was at the gym...

I was on the treadmill. I was working it, running, sweating my balls off (no really, their gone!). This guy running next me to me decided to ignore the ear buds in my ear and start up a conversation.

Him: "Are you from Texas?"

Me: "Yes." Lie.

Him: "Really that's cool, I'm from Tyler, you know near Dallas."

Me: "That's cool, I lived in Austin." Haha...see truth.

Him: "Did you go to school at UT?"

Me: "Yes." Lie.

Him: "And did you cheer there too?" (I'm assuming he only asked this because of my UT Cheerleading shirt I had on.

Me: "Yes." Lie.

Luckily the conversation stopped there before he asked me what I majored in and I blurted out "Physics"!

Nobody wants to hear that I am just a mom, my cheerleading days in Austin sounded a lot more interesting.

I think I need help. 12 program for liars, here I come!

A blank mind

My mind is blank today.

Really I can't think today.

I sat down to write today to try and motivate myself to get up and do something. And I can't think of ANYTHING.

I was going to write about sex. Something about if sex is still satisfying even if you don't "get there". But then I felt too dirty with what direction it was taking.

I then started to write about how I was a simple girl. But lets be honest, I am a complicated mess. I over analyze, under trust, and at times I am TOO honest.

So nothing. I am nothing. To be completely honest, I am in SUCH a bad mood. I am faced with another long boring weekend of nothing much to do and its making me cranky. Just having one of THOSE days. So I am going to disappear for the weekend, Shut myself in and sulk. Maybe Monday will be much better for me...Here's hoping.

Birthday wishes

So of course you all know that yesterday was my big guys birthday. He had a blast, he got his Nintendo DS that he's been asking for forever, and he got to run wild at Chuck E Cheeses.

But of course as it always does, his birthday has brought up the inevitable question. What does he want for his birthday?  He's 4, he wants toys and things that make loud noises that will drive his mother up the wall.

So now that his birthday has come and gone...means that my big day is just around the corner. And now I am faced with the question...what do you want for your birthday little girl? (Okay well maybe not the little girl part because to be honest that sounds a little creepy, but seriously don't you always kinda hear the little girl part in your head when someone asks you this questions?)

Hmm...really you want me to tell you what I want for my birthday???

~World peace. Okay totally not achievable but wouldn't it be nice?

~A job. Really yet again something totally up to me and my future employer.

~A solution to the water crisis in Africa.

~For my 2 year old to stop saying he hates everything. OH and for him to stop pooping in his pants too.

~For my 4 year old (yes my 4 year old now!) to stop growing, What a magical age he's at right now, I would love to keep him here forever.

~A real diamond tiara. Cause really what girl DOESN'T need one of these.

~For an end to the oil spill in the gulf. Really like a permanent end.

~For homelessness to be abolished.

~A new cell phone. Berry has been acting up too much that I can't put my faith in him anymore. And really I am ready to move on to bigger and better things.

~A pony. Because a little part of all of our girlhoods never die. And for once I would like to see this wish fulfilled.

~Nursing school paid for by someone else other than me. Loans are great, but they DO have to be paid back eventually.

~A good steak and a nice glass of red wine. A Shiraz. Yum.

~A better economy.

Well you asked so I answered. I don't ask for much...lol

Really for birthday celebrations, I just want good company, perhaps a fun place to dance, and maybe even a laugh or two.

1460 days

Today you turn 4 years old.

You have changed so much already just from the first day I saw you till now.

Now you say your ABC's.

Now you can count . To 20 sometimes.

Now you are eager to help me when you can.

You are really into electronics.

You love to play Wii.

You are the goofiest little dude I know.

You love to make people laugh.

And you love to dance.

You are an amazing little man.

You are so curious and you ask questions.

You love to sing songs and listen to music with me.

I am so happy that I was chosen to be your mom.

I love you SO much!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Can a girl get a break?

I am so run down right now, I think I may either have strep throat or I have forgotten how to swallow.

Seriously my tonsils are so swollen you would think I had ping pong balls in the back of my throat if you happened to look. Perhaps I should go to a doctor.

Leave it to my sweet, beautiful, loving children to run a MUCK today. Really bouncing off the walls. I swear they got into my red bull collection in the fridge while I was trying to catch a few more minutes of sleep on the couch. Already in the hour and a half that we've all been up, I have cleaned up dog puke, cleaned out red jello out of the carpet, broken up 5 fights, and punished Eds for slapping his brother. I am EXHAUSTED. I am tired and sore, and it hurts to even open my mouth.

Really can a girl get a break?

Shut the front door

I am a firm believer on saying what you need to say. I always feel that its better to share you mind than it is to let feelings fester to the point of not really knowing what you feel anymore. But in those times when your speaking your two cents, talking and sharing your feelings, do you sometimes say too much?

Is there times when we really should shut the f up?

We've all been there before. You've said your mind. But you just keep going.

"What I meant to say was..."

Shovel. Dig. Toss the dirt to the side.

"No, you took what I said the wrong way."

Man this hole is getting deep.

"What I'm just saying is..."

Hello? Hello? Can anybody hear me from down here?

I am very guilty of just continuing to ramble long after the point that I wanted to make was made. That's when things start getting confusing. So in my always going mind of self reflection, I am vowing to just say what I feel I need to say, and then shutting the f up. In a clear effort to only say what I need to say.

Him

He makes me insanely happy.

He always has something goofy to tell me like a joke or something funny that happened.

He assures me that I am always on his mind, and I fully believe him.

He makes me feel like the prettiest, smartest, funniest girl on the planet.

He talks to me and always tells me whats on his mind. There's no second guessing with him.

He has the most adorable face, even when he's pouting!

He loves his son, his family, and his friends. And he allows me to be a part of it all.

He sees a future with me and that doesn't scare him off. He actually embraces that.

We can always have a good time together no matter what we are doing.

Okay throwing up in your mouth a little bit? I'm incredibly lucky that I found someone like him. I'm so happy to see where this could lead me in the future.

Trust and sacrifice

When you truly love someone, you trust them with all your heart. And you also learn to sacrifice for them. You know you either learn how to go without, or push yourself out of your comfort zone for them.

But how much is too much?

Being in a relationship with someone is one of the most challenging thing we do as human beings. It ranks right up there with childbirth, receiving your education, and um world peace. We like to always try and convince ourselves that when you are with someone you are a team, and then we like to try and follow that up with saying "its all 50/50". But it never really is.

Unfortunately, especially in these tough times, we can't always be 50/50. There are gonna be times in a relationship when one person is going to have to bear more of the load. Sometimes its through an illness, sometimes its financial issues, and sometimes its something as simple as cleaning duties at home. This is where the sacrifice part comes in. Nobody likes to be 100 percent responsible all the time, and the task can becoming daunting no matter HOW much you love the person. But here's where the trust part comes in...You have to trust that this too shall pass, and that things will pick up and become better. And that sometime in the future, your gonna be the one down and out, and your partner will be there to hold you together.

Its is all about giving and taking and in some situations, there is gonna be one person taking a whole lot while the other is forced to give all they've got. But as long as it comes from a place of love on both sides, its SO worth it in the end.

Old dog new tricks?

Can you really teach an old dog new tricks?

Its no secret, the older we get the more set in our ways we become. Many attribute it to becoming old and cranky, but I believe that you just become more comfortable in you your skin and less afraid to be yourself. You've been through the trial and error portion of your life and you know what makes you happy and what sets you off. But do you become too set in your ways that your unable to be open to something new?

You live your life day to day and you get into a rhythm. You work, you play. You know how you like to spend your free time and you like your freedom. So what do you do when a wrench gets thrown into the mix?

Change is not always bad. Things may be good now, but there's always the possibility that it could get better. So listen dawg, practice some patience and learn some new tricks. Yes it may change your life, but it could be for the better.

Annoying little me

Bad habits. We all have them. I know I do. So in the spirit of self reflection (and because I have NOTHING to write about today), I thought I would share a few of mine. This should be interesting.

~I bite my nails. Yeah to the point where I have to keep them short so I don't chew them. I have chewed them down to the point of pain before. Its gross and awful.

~I'm messy and disorganized. I know everything has its place, but I still haven't figured out where most every things places are.

~I can never seem to finish an entire drink and take my cup to the sink. Wherever I got bored with drinking my drink, is wherever I left my cup. And that is where it will probably stay until I pick up later on down the road.

~I get bored throughout the day and check Faceboook a lot. Its retarded, but I have a lot of funny friends so they entertain me with silly post of videos or thoughts and sayings.

~I procrastinate. A lot. Hey I work best under pressure.

~I can be kinda lazy. My favorite thing to do is lay on the couch and just watch TV, or surf the internet, or wrestle with the boys. As long as its on the couch, I'm good.

~I'm almost too relaxed sometimes. This makes it next to impossible for me to make simple decisions like what to eat or where to go.

~I am great a actually cleaning the laundry. I love to put the clothes in, getting stains out, loading the dryer and the smell of my dryer sheets. But I almost always forget to take the damn clothes out of the dryer until like days later when I can't find any clean underwear. Thank goodness for ironing boards.

More than words

I love you.

Three simple words that drive some people mad.

I love you.

Some people need to hear it, most people like for the person feeling the love to prove it. Simple things. Offering help on a busy day. Bringing flowers, ordering take out when you know they don't want to cook.

We've all heard the old adage since we were kids, actions speak louder than words. I love you are some pretty big words, but they can mean nothing if you can't prove it. But luckily for majority of us, it doesn't require big actions. Its easy today to get lazy, to get comfortable in the trust of your partners love. So we forget to do the things that the other one appreciates. Getting her her favorite candy. Cooking him his favorite meal.

So remember that its just not enough to tell someone that you love them. Prove it. Be a fool for love. It will pay off big in the end.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!

I have fallen off the face of the earth. Well not literally, we all know that can't happen. But no I have not been around lately. Things have been crazy busy around here, although most days I feel like I haven't done a thing. So I thought I could use this post to update you all a little bit.

The boys are growing like crazy! My proudest moment thus far happened to me the other day. Eddie is really starting to get a grasp of his numbers. We were meeting my mom, her friend, and her friends 2 kids. 4 people all together, at a store. We found my mom with one of the kids and Eddie got all excited. After giving hugs and kisses, Ed says "We found 2 of them, now we need to find 2 more!". I was SO proud of him!!! My goodness how great his little mind works. Lucas is in his stage where he questions EVERYTHING. And he is a curious little guy. We are having a blast so far this summer with slip and slides, swimming, trips to the zoo, and cook outs. I still have a few things in store before summers over which I can't wait to share with them.

4th of July festivities where well on their way this past weekend. We decided to split the boys up so Eddie went with his dad and I took Lucas with me to my friends party. She has an annual 4th of July celebration at her father-in-laws beautiful historic home. The day was filled with swimming, hanging out with friends, and fireworks. It was really fun to spend the whole day with Lucas. He is such a little social butterfly and he was not shy at all to walk up to someone and start a conversation. He stayed up late, loved the fireworks, and was out like a light for the rest of the night. We had a good time.

Things in the new relationship are going great! Nothing really new to report or anything I actually wanna share with anyone at the moment. lol But I am really enjoying myself and feeling very thankful that I met him. I am a happy girl. That's all anyone needs to know right now.

So that's about it I think. I have a phone interview today with Children's Place. I don't mind retail but I am just disappointed that I can't get a job in something that I spent a lot of money and time going to school for. But any job to pay the bills would be nice at this point. This may just be the sign that I should just get into nursing school and go all the way. We shall see. So tomorrow, I promise to return to full form and write about the things you really wanna hear about.

That movie with the Vampires...

So this total cutie called me up yesterday and asked me if I wanted to go see this little movie that not many people have heard about. He said it was something about vampires and a twisted love story...intrigued I went along.

Yeah I went and saw Eclipse last night. AMAZING!! Team Edward all the way...

Yeah I would so freeze to death in a tent up in the mountains of Washington just to be with him. That crooked smile, I can't resist it.

Yes, I know that he's a fictional character. Yes I know that someone wrote the words he speaks to Bella. But in my blissful state of happiness at the moment, I can't but think to myself how romantic the whole notion of the love affair between Bella and Edward really is. I mean this girl is willing to literally give her life for him, to be with him FOREVER. Like really forever because they are vampires, the are immortal. Just in case you don't really follow this stuff. And Edward is willing to fight to the ends and even join with his enemy to protect her. Its a very sweet notion that love could run that deeply.

So go see it. Its got action, its got romance, its got Jacob with his shirt off a lot. haha. Good movie.

New BFF's

I love making new friends.

Ok I never grew up in one place. Because we were a military family, we were all over the place. So I never really had like childhood friends. I can't say that I still talk to someone that I went to 3rd grade with. Heck I don't even really talk to a bunch of people I went to high school with.

When your an adult, making friendships is hard to do. You are more set in your ways and less tolerant of things. Not to even mention how just day to day life gets in your way. So you learn to value your friendships more than ever. So its always a blessing when you come into a friendship in your adult life.

I have just recently developed a close friendship with my girl Andrea. We literally can talk for hours, and we joke around about everything. It is a friendship that I see lasting for a LONG time.

SO I guess I am just in a happy, philosophical mood this morning. I know friendships are hard to come by these days, so I really do value and appreciate the ones I do have.